RoastChicken

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Category: Food   Page type: Normal
  1. Get a free range chicken (death camp chicken won't suffice)
  2. Preheat oven to 180-200C/Gasmark5
  3. Put in roasting pan
  4. Oil slightly with olive oil
  5. Sprinkle lightly with salt
  6. Put in oven
  7. Wait about 1hour to 1h30.
  8. Breathe through nose occasionaly, using olfactory sensors to detect for the smell of smoke, a possible sign that the chicken, or the chicken fat, is burning.
  9. Eat.


alternatively:

  1. Drizzle a tablespoon of oil onto chicken skin
  2. Sprinkle salt, black pepper & thyme onto skin
  3. Cover chicken in oven proof dish with foil shiny side in.
  4. For every 1lb of chicken 30mins gas mark 7/220oC.
  5. add an extra 30 mins for crispness.
  6. For the last 30 mins take off the foil.

--Womble 20:46, 25 October 2005 (BST)

alternatively #2:

  1. Slice some onion into circle bits and lay onto roasting tin
  2. Do the same with some lemon slices and put ontop of onions (skin intact), then shove the remainder of the lemon and onion (chopped up) inside the chicken's butte
  3. Lay some sprigs of thyme ontop, then rest chicken ontop of that.
  4. Poke some holes into the chicken breast and legs from top down (use a skewer or small sharp knife)
  5. Squeeze juice of a lemon or two over the bird and rub it into the holes (lol), then rub salt, black pepper and lemon zest into the skin.
  6. shove some thyme up its butte and maybe a few small springs in each of the flesh holes (i'm getting aroused at this point)
  7. Roast as normal, noting that the skin will turn a slightly different colour than normal because of the lemon.

As an added twist, try squeezing lemon juice and sprinkling some thyme/rosemary over potatoes before roasting to compliment the meat. A few glugs of sesame oil is also nice.

FYI using olive oil in a very hot oven (200C+) will probably lead to burning because olive oil burns at quite a low temperature, so any kind of nut oil (sesame, ground nut, blah) might be better. -- Bluec

alternatively #3:

Do what my Nana used to do when I was a child:

  1. Smother a dead chicken in some kind of highly addictive and delicious powdered coating, the ingredients of which are unknown and I should probably find out before my Nana dies. It's probably either jamaican jerk mixed with powdered nicotine, or just a packet of generic chicken coating from Tesco.
  2. Put the chicken in the microwave for as long as the microwave timer will allow you to put it in for in one go
  3. Allow to stand for 1 minute
  4. Handstand for 5 minutes
  5. Eat the chicken