Vienna

See Wien
Vienna is home to some of the world's greatest Austrians. Amongst them such luminaries (Koryphäen) as Elfriede Jelinek...and many others...such as the politicians...and many, many more...erm...

Vienna is also famous for its coffee house culture, indeed without this 'legally acceptable' drug perhaps Vienna wouldn't have produced such world talents as those mentioned above. We can say though, without a shodow of a doubt, thanks to amongst other things, coffee, that Vienna, at one time, in the eyes of some, was once and forever will be, according to certain Austrian history books, 'great.'

Once home to over 180,000 Jewish Austrians, Vienna is now home to the same number of 'Turkish' Austrians who own most of the bakeries which are open when you actually want to buy something (like the Jewish usurers of past generations providing a much needed service while at the same time being despised for it).

Other 'auslanders' include 'tschuschens' - a derogatory word for the Slavs - who are characterised by their 'tschuschen koffers': that is, their Slavic suitcases, also known as plakkie bags (plastic shopping bags). This minority can often be seen in its largest numbers outside train stations with battered accordions or simply plastic cups or tattered caps as accoutrements to their well polished trade of wheedling money out of miserly, whistling Austrians.

Moriarty